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2015-01-23 - Everything's Better With Pirates
A week ago, the New York television and internet started announcing a singular event soon to occur: a centuries-old ship was found on a deep-sea expedition with sonar, and the readings seemed to suggest that the ship was in reasonable shape. This sparked interest by scientists and historians, and divers with high-pressure suits and gear were able to inspect the ship. Reports came in, followed eagerly by a slightly slow press week, and soon the public was interested. A true Spanish Galleon, found nearly intact! With inspection, it was found to be in incredible shape due to a strange current that left the area perfect for preservation, but it was nearly impossible to bring the ship up to the surface. Then, with the public eye on it, there was an offer. Superman offered to give a hand, bringing the ancient artifact up to help with the efforts of science! So today is the day that the city's Kryptonian was meant to appear and lift the ship up the fathoms to the surface. Unfortunately, as the public gathers at the dock curiously to witness this bit of history unveiled, there is news. A volcano eruption has waylaid the hero. But he assures the press, there will still be help coming! Worry not, folks! Cecannia Eirissach is there for passive monitoring. Odds are that fifty/fifty there will either be some sort of supervillain attack trying to steal the gold, or there will be some srot of cursed artifact that is activated when the Galleon is brought in and a monster comes out from another hell-dimension where it was dispatched to. Okay, maybe /not/ fifty-fifty, but Cecannia is still there, in plainclothes to monitor in the 'just in case' category. She really needs to get out more.. Cassie Lang is in the crowd with a group of high school kids. The school felt that this was an excellent chance for the kids to get a glimpse of history in the making, while giving them pirate hats and eye patches. At least one of them is still wearing the hat, while several kids seem to be wearing TWO eye patches and wandering around blindly, mocking the event thoroughly. Cassie is trying really really hard not to slap anyone in her class outing. There are a couple of her handprints on kids already though. Kara Zor-El flies up from under the bay. It looks sort of like a ship just rising from the waters... until it comes out of the water with the girl dressed in blue and red carrying it. Too bad - she actually wanted to sail a an actual galleon. She'd watched all three of those Pirates of the Carribean movies recently with Dedrick. But it's just not seaworthy to do stuff like that. Plus this is what the people wre expecting instead. She makes a little face though - Hudson Bay is NOT exactly clean. Peter Parker was subtly swinging through the city not calling attention to himself "wow a spanish galleon found this near by I wonder if there is any gold still on it. I could use a ship full of old spanish gold and silver myself, My rent is neighter cheap nor controlled. The influx of hipsters is driving my rent out of hand, while singing songs from the musical..." Either way peter was making his way to the docks to take pictures for the new papers tomorrow knowing that some choice pics for a puff piece would get him soem extra money in his pocket. "This must date back to when the dutch controled new york. dutch privateers snatched it in the virgin islands and and must have taken it to new amsterdam to re supply before attempting to go east to holland." Peter says out loud making mental notes as he prepares his camera for the arrival. Peter quickly snaps a serious of shots of super girl lifting the ship out of the water. Great! sweet action shot of the ship being lifted by a superhero! An attractive wet lady superhero. Triple J will be all oer these pics for sure. Cecannia Eirissach is currently walking along and peripherally watching the crowd, as well as the Galleon and the crew coming in then, as well as the press conference. She maintains the visage of another bored and gawking tourist as she watches, passively alert for any trouble and figuring if there is anything it will be ou tof her league. The ship sloughs off seaweed and water as it rises majestically out of the bay, carried by the lovely Supergirl with apparent ease. The crowd turns as it begins to appear, and they applaud loudly for her and for the ship as it is carried to the prepared landing area: a large specially crafted cradle for the ship to rest in. The ship's mast is still intact, though the sails are long since rotted away, but the lines of a true Spanish galleon are unmistakeable, and they do make good pictures. However, there are some gasps as the ship turns broadside to the crowd, and barely visible under the years of wear is a large burned skull and crossbones. A pirate ship! The scientists are abuzz with this! Kara Zor-El had taken note that, while the Spanish Galleon was not one of the larger ones (only 900 tons, rather than 1200 tons) - it did seem to still have some cargo on it. She didnt want to go exploring it while underwater. What with the press waiting and her not being sure how stable the ship would be. It -looked- pretty stable though, other than the hole in the side, obviously what caused it to sink. Shouldnt be hard for the historians to fix. Kara didn't understand about 'historical accuracy' and how most historians would balk at the idea of acutally repairing an archeological treasure like this. Kara sets the ship down on the setup in the bay - a floating framework specifically for this purpose - before flying over and landing by the Mayor and the Press. She waves at the 'audience.' "Hi everyone. Sorry that my cousin couldn't make it - there was a volcano in Burma." Cassie Lang breaks away from her class, trying to find a way to get signal on her phone. She can't SEE anything from here anyway, what with the whole thing being taken care of by the bigwigs, but there's at least one live feed being sent out and she's got a fuzzy picture of the whole thing streaming to her phone. Might use up her monthly bandwidth but eh, that's what it's for. "Jeez, Josie, get a better angle. I can't even see Supergirl." Cecannia Eirissach walks over to the side, and manages to give a half annoyed glance at Supergirl. That's the girl who buzzes the Hellicarrier all the damned time. Otherwise, Cecannia goes to watch over at the pirate ship. Currently wondering how long before the zombies come out of it like the Disney ride.. Peter takes a few more shots of the ship on land and then wall crawls his way to where Kara is speaking to get some shots of her addressing the crowd. "this sure is cool. but yeah ok ok Supergirl talking not much here just better get some picks of her just because. But-" Pater webs the camera to the wall behind him. "I don't need to be here for that. I think I caught something from black cat because my curiousity is killing me like a cat the is killing by the curiosity, yeah.... gotta stop quoting bonesaw" Peter says to himself as he sneaks over to get a closer look at the ship. The ship is quickly surveyed for structure, which is not exciting and some of the crowd drifts off, but the focus is largely on the hole in the side of the ship, where there was a glinting of light off something metallic or shining, and Peter Parker's camera captures with its zoom a glimpse of something. With focus, he sees: a chest of what appears to be very slimy mess, but there is a definite glint of gemstones and possibly gold! The same picture is spotted in the live streamer's feed shortly after, giving Cassie and the folks at home a blurry image of something shining. Not quite as helpful to them really, but the streamer insists that it MUST be pirate gold. But Cecannia has a much clearer image on her heads-up glasses, and she knows exactly what that is. We've got treasure inside, what appears to be a chest of gemstones! There is a sound in the background, some boaters on the bay in powerboats, but the scientists request politely if Kara could please take a moment to look inside for everyone before we get mobbed. Cecannia Eirissach rubs the back of her head as she sees the gemstones. At this point she's startin gan internal countdown to how long before someone tries to rob this as she looks on in half amusement. Her hand otherwise rests on her hip then as she watches, wondering which petty larcenist it will be that tries to rob the chest. Kara Zor-El heads into the ship and looks around curiously. She'd been in a a pirate ships before, but at the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean, in really bad condition, and she was only passing by it while going to rescue a sunken submarine. There was actually some treasure in here even. A few chests with gold dubloons, gemstones, sapphires, rubies, pearls. And in particular she sees a gold encrusted ruby locket which, for some reason, catches her eyes. She heads over and picks it up to examine it, looking it over with fascination. She even tries it on. Cassie Lang yawns as she looks at her crappy picture, shutting down her phone. She still hasn't seen anything that really makes her sit up and do much, and has drifted away from her class. She sees what appears to be a photographer, and a secret agent. Not the same person. Meh, there had to be a few of them in this kind of event. "oh there be gold in them thar....ships" Peter says as he catches the glint and gleam of precious stones and metals cutting through the centuries of grime. "what great historical find. how's my breath? I know this many jewels around with out a black cat sniffing around." Peter shakes his head and sneaks a bit closer "this is gonna be on the front page." He says as he centers the honest to goodness treasure chest in the center of a shot. He sees Kara trying on the ruby "hey excuse me miss I'm pretty sure you can't just go touching things this is all historical site now and I'm pretty sure they want it undisturbed for when they come to study it. Trust me I get the temptation to touch some of this stuff though Cecannia Eirissach leans back. If there is a raid or attempted robbery it's going to be just whatever local petty thieves pursue it, and will be dealt wtih by the local metahumans and police. So far, she's seeing nothing which would require SHIELD jurisprudence here, and Cecannia lets out a sigh. The powerboats seem to be running awfully close, and seem a bit loud. Cecannia's fears are suddenly true, as there are suddenly three powerboats pulling up with men pulling on masks, and pulling out guns. Which is absolutely ridiculous. Who pirates a pirate ship? But they seem to be doing that exact thing, with one man yelling out, "Just nobody move and nobody gets hurt, we're just here for the gold." Many guns are trained on the crowd, and they do seem to intend harm to the poor kids and vigilant defenders of history who have gathered for this event. Bullets into the school groups who came to see the ship would end poorly. Cassie Lang sees the people pull up and freezes. She knows, deep in her gut, that there's about to be ...yep. "DOWN!" she shouts to the kids around her, who...ignore her, as she hits the deck before the guns are even pulled. Sigh. Rookies. She gets some odd looks, then people start to scream. Cecannia Eirissach controls her breathing. Yup.. As part of the crowd, she's not got an angle where she could get a good shot off and it's not like the small bore field pistol she has iwth her would be capable of hitting anyone. She keeps her hands decidedly neutral, palms where they can be seen. Kara Zor-El looks at the ruby amulet that she put on, ignoring Peter's commentary. However correct it is. If her super-senses are picking up what's happening outside, she sure doesnt seem to be acknowledging it. Then she suddenly flies up and out of the ship at blurring speed, with the amulet. Peter is forced to jump back as the kryptonian girl buzzes him on the way out. "whoa whats got up her skirt?" Peter says shaking it off then looking around to see the commotion. Peter feigns fleeing in terror and shortly afterward Spider-man swings into the scene. He climbs up to a high spot and swings down by the gra grouping of pirates trainign guns on the crowd and with a net made of webbing snares the 2-3 gun man he was trying to take out. Spider-man lands with a flip and and fires a concentrated web burst at a gun man he missed with his net. "Everyone get out of here. Please exit the area in an orderly but URGENT fashion. pushing and shiving is encouraged but no trampling!" The boat that is dealing with a certain well-known webslinger seems to be faring poorly, though the other two boats are still free to react, and one of them turns their guns on Spider-man and their own men! They really don't seem to be very nice people, though admittedly they do seem to be aiming for the wallcrawler and not their own guys. The third boat, however, is still aimed at the crowd, and the gunmen seem to panic a bit. "Supergirl!" one yells, firing on Kara as she whips past and away. No threat there. "Spider-Man!" another yells, trying to aim at the spider and flailing a bit. The final gunman however just opens up into the crowd of civilians, right into the group of teenagers who came to see a ship. She's at a bad angle, but as a heavy tripod cannon goes to open up on children, hse has no choice. Cecannia goes to whip out th esmall caliber needle gun that SHIELD Agents have in the field and goes to open fire on the gunman opening over on the crowd. Her hands shaking - not due to fear, but to arthritis as she empties the clip. Cassie Lang is down and unlikely to get shot, but she sees the tripod cannon aiming. She closes her eyes and thinks big, wishing she didn't have to do this NOW, and hopes nobody will be paying attention to her anyways. Gunmen and all that. As the man with the tripod gets nailed, several of his shots get off, but he goes down fast, unable to continue and out of the action, nailed by a nameless heroine in the crowd. Unfortunately for him, his first shots don't go into the crowd either. There's something in the way. Giant hand, reaching down from a hundred foot person looming over the crowd. With a red and black suit, and a blonde ponytail and black mask, whoever it is blocks the couple of shots that got off, and is now looking annoyedly at the remaining pirates. "Okay, that's right enough of this." The first thing that happens is a black blur goes around the boat, after which it looks like it's had a quick patch-up to the hole on its side. What was that anyway? It couldn't have been a bird - they're not that fast. Couldn't have been a plane - they don't fly so low. Kara Zor-El stops in front of the 100 foot Stature, between her and the remaining criminals. They're pirates. And Kara's dressed like.... well.... http://tinyurl.com/nno5hhf A pirate. Not like a modern pirate though - like one of those pirates out of the disney movies. Big triangular hat, sword, some sort of blunderbus gun, boots, petticoat, eyepatch. The works. Where did she get a working blunderbus anyway? Or that outfit?! Elsewhere, people at the Smithsonian Institute are trying to figure who entered and stole the outfit and weapons of Jacquotte Delahaye, one of the few female buccaneer of the Carribean in the 1600s. Kara then pulls back a fist and slams it into the side of giant-sized Stature's face. She's small comparatively, but hits like... well.... Spider-man twists and jumps and bends his body to narrowly avoid the bullets whizing past him and he tries to keep the pirates down and away from the bullets too. "hey hey hey whoa whoa whoa calm down you're gonna hit your own people!" spider-man manages to spedn out a series of web shots to try to snare and pull away the guns from the people firing on him as he instinctively dodges and dips away from the bullets. Spider-man then notices that there is a a pretty blond disney pirate smashing Stature in the face. "yar, that's not good cap'n" Spider-man then Webs over to their position. He swings by leaping infront of KAra and trying to cover her with webshot. "Um I don't know what this is but I think you need to calm down we were all upset that pirates of the carribean 4 sucked. but there is no nned for violence!" The pirates in the second boat find their guns whipped from their hands by the webs of the costumed spider-guy that is in the news all the time, finding reason to agree with Jameson's rants. He's a menace, but mostly to the bad guys! Grr. Their guy behind the wheel however decides it's time to try and get the engines running though, and one boat roars away leaving the other two behind to deal with the webs, and the giant. And the...pirate girl? Having emptied her clip, Cecannia quickly assesses the metahumans likely have the event in hand. Reloading her weapon, then going to return it to the small holster as she mentally starts reviewing the facts over in her head for having to file a weapons discharge report later on. Having not spoken a word so far in the altercation, evaluating the.. Probably insane blonde. Stature is tough. Just a moment ago she took two shots from the tripod mounted cannon without wincing. Well, slightly wincing. But as she stands up and finds the pirate girl flying up at her, she starts to try to raise a fist to intercept and swat down Kara. It fails. Supergirl's fist impacts with her jaw, and her giant head flies up and back, her eyes snapping closed, and her entire hundred-foot body is lifted right off the ground by the punch! She lifts into the air a good fifty feet, and comes down flat on her back in the parking lot landing on the mayor's limousine and a good section of the tourist's vehicles. There is a small earthquake caused by the impact, suggesting that Supergirl hits like a...well, like a Kryptonian. Hard. But Stature does not get up after the fall. Kara Zor-El, Steel Maiden of the Seven Seas, knocks the 100-foot tall girl out with the one punch, right before she gets shot with webs wrapping around her. Stan Lee here with a little Science time. Spiderman's webbing is a miracle of chemical genius. Able to shoot out at 300 psi with a stream estimated at up to 60 feet. It's tensile strength is incredible - 120 pounds per square milimeter. That's as strong as steel! Stan Lee out. EXCELSIOR! Kara quickly pushes her arms out, and the webs break in the same way steel would break if she was wrapped up in that. IE, basically like tissue paper, after which her eyes turn red and fire out twin beams of heat vision at Spiderman. Even if it doesnt hit him, it does seem to cut through the building wall which he is on (made of steel and brick) like butter. Kara says loudly, "ARRR! YE LAND LUBBERS BEST BE HANDS OFF OF ME SHIP AND ME CREW. AND MOST CERTAINLY ME TREASURE!" before flying down to the ground where several of the criminals have been captured, getting between them and the police and other heroes. She lands, hitting the ground with her feet HARD. Breaking-the-ground hard. Yup. Definitely insane blonde here. Quickly evaluating how.. Out of her league she is, Cecannia is torn between calling in a strike team for backup along with the knowledge that they have -nothing- or just praying that the local.. Whatever the hell that luchador is can handle it. Her hand reaches down for her pistol.. And a few thoughts begin to foment in her head. "If this be your treasure, then you're making a big mistake by putting it all out here in the open." Cecannia calls out, "You'll risk Blackbeard himself coming to get it if you don't hide it. And do you think that an ornery puss such as he would let something like death get in the way of him chasing after your treasure?" Spider-man just barely manages to avoid being fired but still gets a burn. "holy crap... it's super girl. Welp I'm screwed." When Kara makes her declaration. spider man replies wincingly "It belongs in a museum!" He sees the red glinting reflection of something resting in her cleavage. "As does that." spider-man thinks remembering what he told Kara moments before she bugged out like it was act like a pirate themed super villain day. Spidey waits to see if Kara turns her attention to the older lady with the gun for a moment before trying to make his next move. The pirates take this moment as a gift. Their men are freed from the police and they pile into their powerboats, turning to the controls to try and speed off. Turning to their controls as stated, though, they pause, then start shouting at each other angrily, and running around their boat helplessly as they realize that Spider-Man was here, and firing webbing at them. Their controls are covered in steel-strong webbing and completely unuseable, their boats utterly useless, and they're going nowhere. Cassie Lang wakes up staring at the sky in the parking lot. She looks around, trying to figure out what hit her, and as she sits up she realizes she's still huge. Thinking 'small' she vanishes from sight, the giant person in the parking lot becoming inches tall and trying to find a way to vanish from the embarrasment. Kara Zor-El looks at the 'real life' pirates. "Wrong boat, me mateys! To the Black Pearl!" Yeah she's just totally ripping off the movie. It's not her fault. Kara has no experience with pirates other than the movies. They didn't have pirates on Krypton. Even in their history. She turns at CeeCee angrily. "If that cur of a seadog even touched me treasure, I'd send him to Davey Jones!" Again she turns to the 'pirates.' "ON DECK ALL OF YE!" Then she suddenly does that superspeed black 'blur' again. Pirates who were on their diabled ships? They're on the deck of the pirate ship. Pirates who were in handcuffs? They're now on the deck of the pirate ship with broken handcuffs. Pirates who were in cars? They're now on the deck of the pirate ship. The doors are in the Hudson. And Kara? She's on the pirate ship also, at the front. "ONWARD MEN! IF ANY SOUL TRIES TO STOP US FROM LEAVING PORT, I'LL SET THEM ABLAZE! FORWARD MEN!" she yells, pointing her sword. Despite the fact that the ship doesnt have any sails. And is still on the framework, even if it's repaired. Wonderful. Cecannia was going to have to make an addendum in her report about just how damned -fast- the alien girl isand how damned well she /functions/ at that level of speed. Cecannia doesn't make a grab over for her weapon, just watching the Supergirl warily. "Well if you're here you're definitely not stopping him, booty or nothing. You're going to have to keep the chest hidden or you'll risk him coming to pillage it." At this point, her sole focus is trying to convince the Supergirl to leave the area, pirates in tow or not. They can't afford civilian collaterals. "Well this is a thing a thats happening she's gonna try to take that old thing to sea... I can promise that thing is sooo rotted through that the first big wave or strong wind is going to break it into soggy saw dust." Spider-Man tries to sneak on to the ship hanging on for dear like to the rotted haul waiting for a chance to get a shot at her. "oh god this is just a whole lot of bad ideas. He webs up to the top of the mast. "Hey cap' jackie, how do you expect to sail with oiut sails?!" The police take a few shots at this point, and are quickly stopped by their sergeants. They are not really trained for dealing with super-pirates, and quickly are told to stand down by their radios. It appears that someone higher up has told the police to stand down and do crowd control, getting the civilians to safety, so they are quickly removed from the scene. The pirates, however, look kind of stunned. Mostly. One in particular grabs ahold of the ship and calls out, "Aye aye captain!" before looking for some way he can actually be of use. Another, the only female pirate human, salutes Kara and grins under her mask. Kara Zor-El, scourge of the seas, frowns that her ship isnt moving. "ARRRRRRR .... SCURVY JACKANAPES! DO I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING MYSELF?!" she yells at her 'crew.' Then she sees Spider-man on her mast, and flies up to him. Cecania's report is going to have to emphasize how freakishly fast those aliens are. She grabs at Spiderman's neck. Spider-sense is great, except when dealing with someone who can move around 7 times faster than the speed it takes for a nerve signal to go from the brain to the body. "Off o' me ship, ye scallywag!" she snarls at the friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man in a most unfriendly and unneighborly way, with that ruby amulet still dangling around her neck, moments before she throws him into the Hudson Bay with the flick of her wrist. Though not before he can ... cop a feel? Nope. Grab the amulet. It doesnt snap Kara out of this pirate kick though. Red Kryptonite lasts 24 hours after all. Kara then flies down to the bottom of the ship and lifts it up and flies off with it. Either to get it repaired and seaworthy for plundering or whatever pirates do nowadays. Drink rum? Spider-man swims up to the surface and pulls up his mask to breath better keeping his eyes covered. "That was a heck of a thing. Maybe don't want to ask her out..." He holds up the amulet and says "Good thing black cat taught me some tricks other than that one thing she does with her tongue. Hopefully supergirl will be back to normal soon" Cecannia Eirissach just lets out a sigh, and then lowers her hands.. This is going to be one very not fun report. One very not fun report at all.